The Year Of Celibacy

To know oneself is the epitome of pleasure. ~Stylicia~

Celibacy is considered to be known as the act of abstaining from sexual relations. The synonyms that coincide with this word is as follows: purity,virginity,singleness and virtue. Celibacy is more than abstaining from sexual activity but it is an act of becoming pure in mind, body and soul. It is also the recognition of understanding the importance of becoming one, whole and enjoying singleness.Many women spend their life going from one relationship to the next but feel depleted and empty after each relationship ends. The woman becomes distorted because pieces of her mind, body and soul is scattered across the world with each man that she dated. Instead of taking time to get to know herself she finds herself back in another relationship that pulls her further away from her true self. This cycle is an abusive cycle that many women find themselves participating in everyday. There comes a time when a woman has to make a decision to become whole to help her find her authenticity.

For the first time in my life I decided to take a journey into celibacy being whole in all areas of my life. When I reflect on the 32yrs. of my life I cannot remember a time when I took time to be involved with getting to know myself, my likes, my dislikes, and what I truly wanted in life. I found myself always involved mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually with a man. I constantly gave pieces of myself to them and in this process I begin to lose me. I wanted the man that I was involved with to love me and marry me but the story never ended that way. The truth is I did not know who I was at all. I was passive about what I wanted and was not assertive about getting my needs metin the relationship. I began to settle and accepted whatever that was served to me but in reality I was not being true to myself. However, in April 2011 I decided to take a vow of celibacy in all areas of my life especially in my relationships with men. I attracted the same men over and over but I had to realize it was something in me that had to change. It has been 8 months in my journey of celibacy and it has been the best time in my life for me to get to know who I am and spending quiet time with myself.I have gotten to know what mechanisms makeup “Stylicia”. The journey has sometimes been painful facing issues that were hard to face but exposure is important if wholeness is your final destination. The things that you chose not to expose can be the things that will harm you in the end.
I have become one with the person on the inside of me; the person that was dying from malnutrition and needed to live again. I am becoming my AUTHENTIC self day by day. When I make the decision to date and connect back with the outside world I will have a different outlook. I will not attract the same men because my spirit will be whole and healthy. This year of Celibacy has taught me how to celebrate my singleness in a great way. Singleness is a celebration of oneness, wholeness and cultivating healthy relationships. The patterns of dysfunction is terminated when you decide to take control of your life and be the woman God created you to be. No longer letting the real you die on the inside while you become an imitation.

Take a journey into celibacy and become the true you, the woman God has fearfully and wonderfully made you to be!

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