It was obvious I was lost in translation on this path of finding my purpose. I spent years trying to search for what fulfilled my soul but I was clueless. I needed something to reignite my fire. What was I missing? Uhm….it dawned on me, I was missing passion.
If I could retrace my steps, I lost my passion at the end of 2006 while stationed in South Carolina. A series of negative things kept happening in my life and consequently South Carolina became my arch nemesis. I truly wonder why I chose such an isolated place away from all the people & things I loved.
When I finally finished my 9yrs of military service I was left with the decision to leave or stay. Honestly, I wanted to run as far away from here as I could but I was hurting. I needed a fresh start but I didn’t believe this would be the place of my new beginnings. However, God’s plans for my life was greater than I could imagine.
So, the journey started as the walls came tumbling down brick by brick each layer exposed a deeper part of my pain. I was left naked with the pure ugliness of who I became over the last several years.
While I kicked and screamed my way through the journey I became tired of the misery. I was tired of the circle of insanity and often begged the Lord to let me leave South Carolina. I was angry; I wanted God to tell me why I was here. But I had no idea that all the misfortunes were just preparing me for my purpose. I was challenged to romance the stones in my life and change them into diamonds.
It’s funny; as much as I wanted to leave God used this place of transition as a place for me to become whole. Whatever, I thought I was looking for found me. And as I continue to heal I am feeling more alive everyday embracing the passion that sets my soul on fire!