There Is No Competition

You can access this podcast episode here: https://tinyurl.com/yzej4e8w

You: Mirror, mirror on the wall; who is the best of them all?

Mirror: You are my darling.

What if we believed that we were the best instead of comparing ourselves with someone else?

In a show and tell world, we have become fixated with keeping up with the Joneses instead of concentrating on our own life. Social media has made it easy to play the game of comparison with strangers we never met. The small reel of a moment in someone’s life makes us question our whole existence. Why do we give social media, people & society so much power?

The concept of competing is ideal in sports, but it becomes messy when we start to feel like we are in competition with others. When we try to constantly keep up with the progression of others, we lose momentum in our life.

 I remember when I went through a period when I tried to help, coach, and counsel everyone else. My life was falling apart while others were thriving; from my advice, I became the poster child for fixing everyone’s life but my own. I began to feel depleted and used. And I realized people were only calling me to discard their problems on me. They felt better but I carried the emotional weight. Overall, I was enabling a toxic cycle in my life.

In the last couple of years, I have set boundaries, let go of toxic behavior and patterns while loving people from a distance. And I have decided to incorporate a life of minding my own business, which brings me peace. Although we reside in an oversaturated technology-induced world, we can still find ways to unplug from the virtual world and plug into our real life.

When we begin to assess what we don’t desire in our lives, we can build a life we love versus numbing out from a life we hate. 

Below are some basic ways you can let go of comparison & compete with becoming the best version of yourself.

  1. Mind Your Own Business. When you feel the need to give your opinion or advice, think before you speak and ask yourself, did the person ask for my opinion?  Here is a podcast episode where I discuss more on the concept of minding your own business & my journey: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gw9AGLGturk  

2. Find Ways To Improve Your Life. Yes, it is tempting to scroll on social media, watch TV, judge celebrities and judge others but think about improving your life. Judging others is a reflection of your own insecurities. 

Here is a podcast episode where I discuss creating a life you love: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xX8MfWIU29E

3. More Focus & Less Distractions. Frequently we try to escape the unpleasant things in our life because we don’t want to face reality. However, if we let go of the temporary mindless distractions, we can meet each situation with grace and love. Here is a podcast episode where I discuss ways you can create an intentional life to stay focus & eliminate distractions: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mtGM_GKHp68

Keys To A Cozy Simple Life

You can listen to this podcast episode here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gdLuB-3v5bg

As the year 2020 is coming to an end, we are spending time preparing ourselves for Christmas and the New Year. We are taking time to slow down, reflect, and review this unusual year. The year 2020 has served us with unforgettable moments that we desire to bury, but we realize embracing a simple cozy life for 2021 may be the cure.

When I went to the dictionary, the word simple is defined as easily understood or done, presenting no difficulty. I think we can all agree 2020 had enough problems to serve us a lifetime of discomfort. However, when life gives us uncomfortable moments, we know that ease is on the way. And finding ways to live a comfortable, simple life can bring us peace, joy, and gratitude.

Below I am giving five essentials ways to begin to live a better life by embracing the Danish concept of Hygge; less is more and other essential elements to living a comfortable, simple life.

  • Embrace a Hygge Life: In 2017, I stumble upon the Danish phrase hygge (pronounce hoo-ga) and it change my life especially during the holiday season. I began to research this concept and found a book by Louisa Thomsen Brits called The Book of Hygge . The book help me unlock the idea of creating a slower life filled with contentment.
  • Practice Gratitude: When you are grateful for what you have you will realize how abundant you are. (book reference: The Magic by Rhonda Byrne)
  • Set Boundaries: Know what you will & will not accept then make adjustments. Setting boundaries will give you a peace of mind.
  • Be okay with pivoting: When things don’t go as plan you have to learn how to adjust and go in a different direction. Pivoting teaches you the art of moving forward despite the circumstances.
  • Simplify to uncomplicate: Get clear on who you want to be, where you want to be and how you want to feel in your life. Then add, subtract and multiply all the necessary elements to uncomplicate your relationships & life.

When you embrace these five concepts, I believe you will start to move towards a cozy simple life!

Breaking All The Rules

As technology continues to evolve in the 20th century it has given us many options on ways we can meet new people. However, in this new genre of dating there are still many do’s and don’ts that can make people feel erratic. Some people have dismissed the notion of finding that special someone in their dating voyage.

Dating has become more like a full time job that has made men and women weary in every aspect. In the midst of the dating voyage many self-help books are created to assist men and women in the dating process. Self- help books, matchmakers and dating coaches have formed an alliance to give men and women a step by step guide to dating and falling in love.

However, I believe there is no magic antidote to dating or falling in love. As I have journeyed through the process of dating I realized rules are meant to be broken. I have read several self-help books on dating which assisted me in the navigation process of dating, but I can truly say the best experience is when you create rules that work for you in the dating journey.

There is no perfect man or woman that you will meet to cure your love drought however, the remedy for your dating blues is knowing what you want in a potential mate. I believe dating should be easy and relaxed when going through the process of meeting that new person. Sometimes dating can feel like a full time job because we tend to put high expectations on the other person.

Everyone should enter into the dating scene with no expectations but to have a great time. When we begin to set high expectations in dating the pressure of authenticity is dismissed because both parties tend to be an illusion of what the other person want them to be. In order to make dating enjoyable I have provided 3 steps to help you “break all the rules” in your dating journey.

Breaking All The Rules Tip:
1. Be Yourself– The most powerful antidote in dating or meeting new people is being yourself without giving someone so much of you in the first meetup. The best thing to put in practice is striving to be subtle. Less is always more.

2. Relax– Take your time to prepare effectively for your date do not put high expectations on the other person before you had a chance to meet them. It is never fair to demand perfection from someone else when you are not perfect either.

3. Fun– Never take fun out your vocabulary, enjoy the moment and do not make plans for the future with the person you are dating. It is important to focus on enjoying the moment and making a new acquaintance. After you have accomplished this understand that it is okay to make rules to fit your boundaries and desires in dating. Dating should be enjoyable not a fulltime job!

After you have accomplished this understand that it is okay to make rules to fit your boundaries and desires in dating. Dating should be enjoyable not a fulltime job!