Creating An Intentional Year…

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The year 2020 has taken center stage, and everyone has made their goals, resolutions & vision boards. With the onset of January comes enthusiasm to make our dreams into reality. However, once February steps in, the spark begins to fizzle, and sticking to our vision fades. The dust starts to settle as we find ourselves back to the beginning waiting for a new year to create more goals, resolutions & vision boards.

Does this pattern sound familiar to you? If so, then it’s time to add intention to your year. According to Webster, dictionary intention is defined as an act or instance of determining mentally upon some action or result. This definition can be translated as changing your mindset to create an effect to accomplish your goals. When you are intentional with your new year goals, visions, and more, you can create a year filled with productivity. Many times we go into the new year with the same mindset from the prior year, which generates an insanity cycle. Instead of producing a new year, we produce another monotonous year.

Below I have three simple tips to help you have an intentional 2020!

  1. Transform Your Mind. Before you can have a fabulous new year in this new decade and leap year, you have to be willing to let go of all negative things in your mind. Make a list of your old beliefs that did not serve you then write new beliefs that will help you accomplish your 2020 goals. (Note: Who do you need/have to become to make 2020 a “new” year?)
  2. Declutter without restraint. Letting go is hard, but things flow better when you make room for what you desire. When you declutter all areas of your life, it can help you gain clarity.  (Note: Do not resist letting go of people, places, and things that no longer serve your life.)
  3. Take Action. Dreams, goals and visions only become reality when you take action. Small actions eventually will measure bigger actions towards your goals. (Note: Fear, procrastination and making excuses are distractions to keep you from being intentional. Face the fears and replace them will faith and confidence in what you want to accomplish.)

Become the Picasso of Your Life

become the picasso of your life

In 2019, I realized to have a different year I needed to become the painter in my own life. So often I have allowed other people to paint their ideas, opinions, and theology for my life which resulted in forgery. Allowing others to paint on the canvas of your life causes fraudulent creations because you are letting them put their vision into action. It is essential to create a vision for your life and be the creator of it. When you put other people into the driver seat of your life it causes chaos. I am learning that when I have a vision, I can’t expect people to understand it or co-sign on it.

A vision is something that gives you clarity about the goals you want to accomplish. When you are not clear about the idea for your life society will cloud your judgment with their perspective. In 2019, it is time for you to take back the paintbrush and begin generating your life masterpiece.

Below I have three specific ways you can become the Picasso of your own life!

1.Create The Vision: Whether it is a vision board, vision journal or collage take the time to define your vision, this will help you see your goals clearly. Then you will be able to create action steps to accomplish them.

2.Stop Explaining Yourself: I have learned the hard way that sometimes it is better to keep your mouth shut. When you prematurely share your dreams, aspirations or goals with others sometimes it can discourage you if their input is not what you wanted to hear. True, we want everyone to be excited about our goals, our life and dreams but understand everyone will not understand the blueprint of your life. God individually designed your life to fit you and others validation is never needed.

3.Creativity is Messy: Understand that the road of life is not a straight line but filled with dead ends, detours and u-turns. When you are handed a blank canvas to create the vision for your dream life know that being flexible is essential. Many artist create beautiful masterpieces by understanding the first stages are messy.

 

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How do you plan to become the Picasso of your life in 2019? (Leave your comment below…)

Hygge for the Holidays…..

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Slowing down……such a foreign concept to me for several years until I settled down in the south. As a single mom slowing down is a challenge everyday because there is always something to do on the checklist. However, in the last two years I have been challenged to slow down and really embrace the present moment. The present moment is crystallized by focusing on the now. The “now” moments are the moments we can never gain back. If this is true, then why do we rush through one event to the next?

Lately, I have been intrigued with going a lot slower in my everyday life. It has made a big difference in my mindset. Although, the holidays are here I am truly embracing slow motion. In my pursuit of this new lifestyle I have came across the word hygge (hoo-gah) practiced by the Danish culture. This lifestyle is a Danish concept that has been popping up everywhere I go. I can’t remember exactly where I heard it but I have been researching a little deeper about this concept. For a long time there was no formal definition for this word however, more Americans have become aware of this concept.

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The holidays is great time to practice this Danish concept especially since Thanksgiving and Christmas is right around the corner. I don’t believe in putting concepts in a box so you have the power to rearrange it the way it fits your life. For example, hygge to me is drinking hot cocoa, tea or wine during the winter months, watching a movie, reading a book and spending some quality time with my daughter.

No matter what concept, tradition or non-tradition you practice slowing down and enjoying the moment should be apart of your daily regiment.

Here is a book I am currently reading check it out in Stylicia’s Reads.

The Journey…

Journey

I can attest to the colloquialism of life that it is a journey not a destination. Life is filled with unexpected detours, stop signs, roadblocks, turning lanes and much more. However, in the midst of it all, life is an adventure. In order to live the adventure you mustn’t resist the lessons it has to offer.

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I have spent almost a decade trying to adjust to a new life since I left the military in 2008. The journey has been filled with ups and downs but it has equipped me to gain sea legs to weather the storm. I have come to the realization that life is filled with Alice and The Wonderland moments. Every time I tried to resist the ebb and flow of life I would wipe out like a person learning how to surf for the first time.

When you are open to the journey of life it will reveal serendipitous moments. These moments will lead you to your destiny. Your destiny may lead you to great adventures and opportunities. Life is not made for the person who love comfort zones instead it challenges you to get out your comfort zone. Comfort zones are security blankets that keep you stagnant.

Stagnancy leads to a life filled with no adventure, boredom, fear and lack. Lack creates a feeling of dissatisfaction which leads to discontentment. As you muddle through your journey be flexible in the ways that life will unfold.

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Art Is Everywhere!

 
(Pictures taken during my visit at Columbia Museum of Art)

If you spend time to slow down you will notice that the collage of art exist right before your eyes. Art is not just hidden in pictures or paintings but the significance of art is in the atmosphere that surrounds us. It is up to us to appreciate the lessons art has to bring in our lives. I am an avid art lover and believe art help us tap into our creative side. Everyone has a creative being that lies dormant ready to be awaken. When we starve our creative being we become stagnant as our life becomes meaningless or boring. Creativity stimulates the brain releasing a positive flow of positive thoughts or ideas to invade our mind. When positive images or ideas stream through our brain we become motivated to create. I had a chance to introduce my daughter to Columbia Museum of Art. The Columbia Museum of Art is one of the best art museum that I have found. I loved studying the Baroque, Rococo and Roman style pictures from the 18th century to the 20th century. It was refreshing to do something new outside of our normal weekend routine. The experience was unforgettable as we gazed at paintings that represented spirituality, womanhood, childhood and family. Each picture had its own distinct message as each artist used certain colors, locations and expressions to capture their message they wanted to convey to the viewer. Art has a way of telling stories whether real or fictional an artist uses his/her surroundings to inspire their work of art. I challenge you to take a day to visit your local art museums or studios to broaden your cultural awareness. Do not hesitate to take your family to give them an experience that will not only be enjoyable but enlightening as well. Art is everywhere if we open our heart and mind to the creativity around us. 

If you live inside the South Carolina area do not hesitate to visit the Columbia Museum of Art. For more information on exhibitions and events go to: http://www.columbiamuseum.org 



My Year of Jubilee, My Year of Celebrating Me!

 
I decided to take a whole year from October 1st 2013 to Oct 1st 2014 to focus on celebrating myself holistically. I realize as women we do not celebrate our accomplishments enough while we cater to so many other people we have to choose to cater to ourselves. I believe we lose sight of who we are because we put ourselves on the backburner supporting everyone else dreams. In this year I will celebrate who I am to the fullest. I am honored and excited to be in the November 2013 issue of Essence Magazine on pg. 14 defining my thoughts on black beauty. Get your copy today!
 
 


Blending In Is Overrated, Blending Out is Underrated!


We live in a society where everyone wants to blend in just to fit in a box. The box implements boundaries and limitations that decrease the level of originality. No one wants to be different because of the paralyzing fear of being rejected. Rejection is the sore that festers from hurt and pain inflicted by others. However, rejection is a part of life and it is the climax of growth. No one who ever strives to be great dodged the bullets of rejection. Rejection is not something you want to embrace but it is a lesson that is worth exploring. Society teaches us the game of being mediocre instead of reaching higher. Mediocre people do not mind blending in and doing just enough to get by day to day. However, mediocrity can cause you to slip and slide into a world of regret and complacency. Mediocrity will keep you stagnant or stale where mold will destroy your creativity, your dreams, your tenacity and much more. People who want more out of life never get caught in the box of mediocrity instead they become busy creating their own path to success. If you fear success then you will never have the motivation to succeed. Failure is the catalyst of learning how to succeed. We never really understand that failure fuels us to have faith to go the extra mile. Do not let circumstances, stigmas, rules or limitations stop you from reaching your full potential. The world will use tactics to stop you from accomplishing all the things that you need to do in life in order to fulfill your God given destiny. It is important you strive to rewrite your script and get back in the driver’s seat of your life. Many times we allow others opinions, ideas and experiences define our own life path. Therefore we have to learn how to blend out. Blending in has become socially acceptable for those who have no ambition to grow higher and move forward. Blending out is about having the courage to speak your truth, stand up for what you believe in, and being honest with yourself. Deception is a silent killer that robs you of your authentic moments in life. The only way to walk in truth is by embracing the person you really are within. Below I will give a couple of tips on how you can be more effective of blending out.

Tips To Blend Out

1) People Pleasing is Overrated. If you are living your life to please others please understand you are doing yourself a great disservice. No one will every truly appreciate you for who you are if you live to make them happy. You will lose your self worth, self love and most of all self respect. Live to please God and yourself.

2) Happiness is momentarily but joy is everlasting. Everyone is on the road to happiness but happiness is just for a moment. You have to make it up in your mind no matter what comes you way you will be content and joyful.

3) Becoming Authentic. You cannot discuss authenticity until you first go through the journey of how to be authentic. Everyone use the word authentic but I wonder if they really understand the significance of the word. Blending out is knowing who you are and becoming your true self. Authenticity is the key to this life journey.

4) Self Fulfillment. We live in a world where it is taught that putting yourself first is wrong but if we are striving to blend out you have to learn to figure out what makes you happy, what are you passionate about and make your dreams happen. Self fulfillment is part of taking the time to get to know what fulfills you and gives you passion.

5)  One Of A Kind. A person who dares to dance to their own rhythm becomes the creator of understanding what makes them unique. When you embrace your unique quality God can use this to change the world. Stay in your lane, expand it and continue to create opportunities instead of waiting on opportunities.

Never be scared to blend out, blending out is the adrenaline you will find on the road to becoming free and becoming you!

Tis’ The Season to Be Colorful

Do not be a drab, be fab & colorful! ~Stylicia~

Fall has quickly slipped in and summer has gracefully left us. However, now that summer is gone the autumn weather will seep in with cooler temperatures forcing us to put on more layers of clothes. Summer exhibits a wide spectrum of bright colors while autumn  tends to bring in the lackluster of colors ranging from blue, black and gray. But this season you do not have to look like a drab for the autumn season because bold colors have taken form for Fall/Winter 2012. During the New York Fashion week bold bright and edgy colors ripped the runaway at the beginning of this year. So, this season its time to take out those bold colors to  implement them in your fall/winter wardrobe. Vibrant colors bring sexiness, fun and joy  into your personality. I decided that color would be my best friend in this season as I introduced it slowly into my fall/winter collection . It is fun to learn new ways to have fun with your fashion wardrobe. Recently, I realized I love loafers, this will be my signature style for the fall/winter months. I decided to use scarves as a colorful neck accessory for this season as well. If you are clueless on how to implement color gracefully and tastefully in your wardrobe this season I will provide a couple of helpful tips to get you in the game! If you are ready to start the journey of color follow the tips below to get you on the move.

Here are the following helpful fashion tips for adding color to your style.

1) Keep It Simple. I realize less is more so slowly add a splash of color in your fall/winter 2012 wardrobe by wearing a colorful scarf around your neck. Make sure the scarf is the only thing that stands out in your wardrobe. Try new colors you never tried before you never know what will work for your skin tone. 


2) Be Colorblind. Do not be scared to mix up colors in your wardrobe. Have fun color- blocking this fall/winter season.

3) Colorful Worldwide. Be bold and add color internationally in your wardrobe from your hats, shoes to clothes and even makeup. It would be good to take a shopping buddy with you that will help you figure out what colors accent your best features. When it comes to makeup make sure you treat yourself to the MAC makeup counter.

4) Color Me Bad. Have the confidence to wear any color…step out & own your colorful wardrobe palette. 

5) Create Your Mood With Colors. Every color has a meaning find out the meaning to create a certain mood with the color you want to wear. For instance, purple is the color for royalty. So if you want to feel like a queen for a day wear purple. 

The Meaning of Colors:


Color Meaning
RED: warmth, love, anger, danger, boldness, excitement, speed, strength, energy, determination, desire, passion, courage
ORANGE: cheerfulness, low cost, affordability, enthusiasm, stimulation, creativity, aggression, food
YELLOW: attention-grabbing, comfort, liveliness, cowardliness, hunger, optimism, overwhelm, Summer, comfort, liveliness, intellect, happiness, energy, conflict
GREEN: durability, reliability, environmental, luxurious, optimism, well-being, nature, calm, relaxation, Spring, safety, honesty, optimism, harmony, freshness
BLUE: peace, professionalism, loyalty, reliability, honor, melancholia, boredom, coldness, Winter, depth, stability, professionalism,  honor, trust
PURPLE: power, royalty, nobility, elegance, sophistication, artificial, luxury, mystery, royalty, elegance, magic
GRAY: conservatism, traditionalism, intelligence, serious, dull, uninteresting
BROWN: relaxing, confident, casual, reassuring, nature, earthy, solid, reliable, genuine, Autumn, endurance
BLACK: Elegance, sophistication, formality, power, strength, illegality, depression, morbidity, night, death
WHITE: Cleanliness, purity, newness, virginity, peace, innocence, simplicity, sterility, snow, ice, cold

 

After all is said & done have fun with colors because this is the season to be a rainbow of joy, laughter, prosperity & fun! 

The Power Of Creativity

A person that has the power to create but stifles the ability by being passive injures the sanctity of creativity. ~Stylicia~ 

Everyone has an innate ability and power to create or produce something greater than their current situation. However, creativity is connected to our soul where thoughts, ideas, concepts and innovation springs alive in our heart. Creativity is best describe to be something or someone who has a sense of genius. They evoke their creativity by producing a visual perception of life. We often connect creativity to being an artist, poet, singer, dancer or designer but creativity is far beyond those activities. God has given everyone the ability to create because if you can visualize it then you can create it. A person that is deemed a creator has a vision and uses his/her words to produce the atmosphere that they desire. If you feel stuck or stagnant in your life then you have not be assertive about tapping into your creativity. You may have allowed distractions to fog your vision and  take you off course. However, in order to tap into your creative power you have to begin to understand the power of creativity. God created the heavens and earth by speaking into existence his visualization of the world (Genesis 1). Visualizing is an important part of creating because it help you produce the atmosphere you see. If you can imagine the life you dream of and clearly see it then the power of creativity can flourish from your vision. Also speaking the words of life will stimulate the growth of your creativity because it will produce the visualization. Words have a powerful connection in creativity because words are the foundation of creating. If you visualize but never speak of the visual stimuli then it lies dormant in your spirit. Some people have no idea of the power of creativity because they often visualize or dream but never speak the words to create the life they desire. In order to start producing the life you often visualize you first have to understand the steps in tapping into your creativity and then activate your power to produce the life you desire. So, below are quick steps to follow to inspire you to tap into the power of creativity to manufacture the life you desire and often dream of:

1. Blockage: The first step is understand what is blocking your visualization or perception of what you see…(i.e fear, torment, low self esteem, people, distractions, passiveness etc.)

2. Identify the distractions: Understand what is it that take you off course and once you pinpoint the “distracting agent” then find ways to discipline your focus by seeing the “BIG PICTURE”!

3.  Power of Words: In order to create you must attach words to your visual perception so make a list of words that identify with what you see or what you dream of…Make sure the words are a conducive to the atmosphere you wish to create. For example, I visualize myself living in Paris so the words I will attach to my visual perception is: love, muse, traveling, excitement, exploration, Eiffel Tower, French  etc. 

4. Activate: Once you practice the three steps mentioned above then it is time to activate your creative power by being assertive about creating your atmosphere. 
  • Research- You can start by researching on the Internet, buying books or going to the library to get information. 
  • Collect data-Demographics, Statistics etc.  
  • Connect- Start connecting with people who are living the life you desire or have experienced the life you often dream about. Surround yourself with like minded people. 
After you have successfully completed the following steps to guide you then you will be eager to activate the power of your creativity….