Lessons Learned on Love…
1) Love Yourself First (Unconditionally flaws and all), Forgive Yourself and Heal Yourself
Love is powerful but if you do not know how to love yourself you can never reciprocate that love to someone else totally. This year I have learned to immerse myself into loving myself in all areas of my life mentally, emotionally, physically and financially. I have been challenged to take time to get to know what I want, what I like and accomplishing my goals. The most powerful lesson I learned was to stop putting myself on the back burner and learning to put myself on the front row. I found out I deserve the best of everything because I believe in my ability to go farther than I could imagine. I had to realize the only limitation that was holding me back was my mindset and the words I spoke about my life. I know now I am powerful beyond measure and only want to attract those who are positive and moving forward in great strides.
2) Love Will Find You….
After exiting a four year relationship with a man that was not the one for me I realized love will find you & you do not have to be desperate to find it. The ending of this relationship help me begin my authentic journey helping me understand the reason I attracted the same type of men. It had nothing to do with them but it was me who had to deal with my own inner issues. I have been on my authentic journey for almost 2 yrs now and it has been a great journey. I feel refreshed, renewed and reborn. I can truly say I am a new me and have a new found love for myself. I understand the importance of self love, enjoying being single and creating the life I desire….I have an new attitude about living life which is…I am living life and not waiting to have a man or get married to live life to the fullest!
Lessons Learned on Life
3) Life is what you create it to be…..
I use to complain and hate where I lived but now I realize you have to make the best out of where you are at. If you are staying in your triangle then your life will remain boring and lifeless. I started to venture out my comfort zone and began to meet new people. I know where I am at is not my permanent place but I might as well have fun living here. Since I have ventured out I have fell in love with so many hidden treasures in the city I live in. It has challenged me to go far and beyond my comfort zone. I am having fun!
Lessons Learned From Friendships….
4) If They Walk Away Let Them Go And Close The Door….
The hardest lesson I learned in 2012 is when you start to change so does the people in your life. I had a 14 year friendship that ended it hurt me to the core but I realized the friendship was no longer the same. Both of us had changed from life circumstances and we were no longer the 19 or 20 yr old girls. We both grew into grown women who had baggage from life that needed to be dumped out. The greatest lesson I learned hurt people hurt people. When two people are wounded there is no way they can help each other. I had to understand where I went wrong with the friendship but in the end I had to let go of the pain and forgive myself in spite of the other party departure. There may have never been a full explanation but just a unfriend button from Facebook but I knew in my heart our life path was taking on different directions. I am learning to be comfortable with people rotating out of my life because we all have a destination to get to in life. As we grow and evolve our circle will also grow and evolve. Forgive, Love & Move Forward!
5) Tolerate and Celebrate….
If you have a friend who is never really happy for your accomplishments and constantly try to degrade you then nine times out of ten this person is jealous. You want to be around people who celebrate you not tolerate you. When you begin to shine then you truly see who really is supporting you. I have learned to reevaluate all my friendships and reposition some friends in my life. I am learning to get to know people for who they really are by discerning their actions, what they say and how they react. I am more open to letting friendships go if they are not mutually beneficial. I realize each friend is for different things in my life but that does not mean they will always be there. Some will stay for a season then when there time is done they will exit the stage. I have came to accept that life is about forward movement and you cannot live in the past but embrace the future head on. In order to get where you are going you have to surround yourself around like-minded people. Positive people are attracted by positive people.
2013 is all about FORWARD MOVEMENT for me, no looking back but forgiving and closing the doors to the past of 2012 and embracing 2013 with newer expectations!
Today I was supposed to take a day off from social media, writing and school work however I was not successful with sticking to that commitment. However, I did take a break from my school work per my daughter’s orders (LOL). It was hard to take a break from my writing because this is what I do best; writing heals me, soothes me and inspires me when everything else seems to fail . It is not hard to take a break from my social media outlets but today I received a great tweet from a fellow writer saying these words:
In a quick instance this tweet uplifted me because when you have a gift and work hard at what you do you pray that soon your gift will be showcased before the world. Her news gave me hope, joy, faith and determination not to cast away my confidence in the gift God has freely given me. When your words have the power to alter someones life then the gift you carry is powerful. Words are powerful, Proverbs 18: 21 says so,”The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit” (NIV).
Eventhough, I have been blessed with so many opportunities in my writing I am still determined to reach higher ground. God has blessed me with an amazing gift to touch people’s soul through the stroke of my pen. I am very grateful for the doors He has opened up in my writing journey this year and years pasted but, Danni’s tweet gave me hope to never settle for mediocrity but continue to reinvent myself through my writing. I am in a different space and place in my life now so I yearn to have more, obtain more and be more . I know where I am is not where I plan to be in the next couple of months. Some may believe that wanting more is wrong but wanting more means you are making a choice to live the life you desire. Why settle for less when you can have more, expect more and live abundantly. We were created to live a fabulous life and today Danni’s tweet reminded me to jump on the bandwagon of expectation; “Expect more, Want More, So You Can Have More!”
You can follow Danni @mzaleck on twitter or check out her site at www.missaleck.com and check her out on essence.com for her feature every Monday for the next 6wks “Dating Tales of a Church Girl “.