The Joy of Minding Your Own Business…

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Have you ever found yourself helping everyone else, trying to fix everyone’s life, or obsessed with controlling what other people do? If so, you have a terrible case of minding other people’s business. There have been plenty of times I found myself trying to be a therapist, life coach, or psychologist to grown adults. My mission was to be the “fixer” in everyone else life instead of tending to my garden. However, I realize I needed to stop being a trash can for other people’s issues. In the end, I was creating codependent relationships.

In my journey of self-evolution and self-discovery, I have found it refreshing to stay focus on my own life. Staying focusing on my own life has helped me work on my relationship with myself. I have become more conscientious of the things that I can expand in my world. Learning to love my life and myself has given me the grace to let go of the thoughts or ideas of worrying about what other people think about me or what they may be doing. When you begin to mind your own business, you will feel lighter. It takes enough energy trying to cope with your life, adding other people’s issues to the equation causes chaos.

I am still on this journey of minding my own business and becoming the best version of myself. It is not an overnight process but a day to day evolution. Worrying about what others are doing, what people think about me, trying to gain people’s acceptance or validation is a waste of time. When you become connected to your inner world and start creating a life you love other people, life will no longer be a concern.

Below are three ways on how you can elegantly enjoy minding your own business:

  1. Disconnect. Unplugging from social media or putting your phone on do not disturb is a great way to focus on the most important person which is…YOU!
  2. Create a life you love. If you are proactive in producing a life you love, you will have less time being consume with other people’s life. You can find a hobby, write a list of all the things you are passionate about or the things you always desire to do.
  3. Drown Out The Noise: Other people’s opinions about who you are, your life and what you do is not your concern. When you know who you are and what you do then other people’s perception is not relevant.

 

1thess411

 

 

Creating A Life You Love…

I spent years playing the game of comparison wishing my life would magically change. I was not aware of the fact that I had the power to change my life. The choice lied within one simple decision that I needed to make. 

Below is a list of ways you can create the life you love.

1. Be grateful.

2. Create a routine.

3. Break your routine.

4. Write down your goals.

5. Write down your dreams.

6. Be intentional.

7. Make a list of what you love to do.

8. Start doing what you love.

9. Be fearless.

10. Be kind.

11. Love more.

12. Be spontaneous.

13. Make yourself a priority.

14. Implement a self-care routine.

15. Be productive not busy.

16. Meditate.

17. Pray.

18. Read more.

19. Smile more.

20. Look for serendipitous moments.

21. Be confident.

22. Spend money on things you love.

23. Make new friends.

24. Spend time with your loved ones.

25. Celebrate your life.

26. Say No often.

27. Don’t  explain yourself to others.

28. Stop seeking validation.

29. Mind your own business.

30. Cultivate a sacred space for yourself.

31. Be mysterious.

32. Travel more.

33. Laugh Often.

34. Delete some people & things in your life.

35. Add some things & people in your life.


 

 

Beauty For Ashes!

to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor and the day of vengeance of our God,
to comfort all who mourn,3and provide for those who grieve in Zion—

to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes,

the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair.

                                                                         (Isaiah 61:2,3 NIV)

In the last eight years my life has been  filled with pain, loss and a lot of hellish moments. I went from living life like the Jeffersons to Good Times. I went from depending on the world as my source to understanding God is my source. I went from being religious to finding a deeper  spiritual connection with God. I went from pleasing everyone else to understanding the power of self-care. 

I had a lot of friends but, as I grew I began to downsize. I went from not recognizing my worth to knowing my worth. I went from undervaluing my gift to valuing my gift. I use to have low self-esteem now I am confident & realize what I deserve. I needed other people to validate my life now I live my life according to my own rules with God’s approval. I found myself minding everyone else business until I learned the power in minding my own business. 

Recently, this year I went through the loss of a family member. I cannot say I am fully recovered but I gave myself time to step back & heal my way. I believe in the power of rising above challenges because what you go through grows you. 

 I strive to be my true self no longer rejecting parts of myself to make other people feel comfortable. In this time in my life I am okay with the woman I am becoming.  I decided to take control of my life, be happy and  make adjustments along the way.

There are six valuable lessons I learned in my life :

1) You cannot do anything without God. If you think you can I guarantee you will be miserable. I know because I tried this method already.

2) Stop comparing yourself to others because you are you. When you start focusing on your own life you become happier and realize how blessed you really are in life. 

3) Other opinions do not matter. People have the right to express themselves anyway they want but try not to take other people opinions personal. You do not need other people to validate you. 

4) Superhero Syndrome. I use to feel like I had to save everyone and go out of my way to make sure they were okay. However, I found out it is not meant for me to save everyone. The people the Lord put in my path are the ones I am assigned too. 

5) Heal Your Way. Do not let people tell you how to grieve. Give yourself time to heal properly. It is okay not to be okay.

6) Let God In. God is a gentleman if you want him to be apart of your life He will be. He is just waiting for you to invite him in.
My life is a constant journey but in my journey the Lord has constantly gave me beauty for my life ashes.

Until Next Time Live Bold. Live Loud. Live Authentically. 

The Joys Of Winter

While winter has reared its ugly head many of us are stationary due to the inclement weather that has cascaded throughout the northern and southern states. The snow has become a foe to many people who head to work in the treacherous cold each day. However, children welcome the light feathery dust that has fallen amidst from the sky. They are filled with joy to see the evidence of snow because they have a chance to make snow castles, snowmen and snow angels. The coldest time of the year is winter where we are forced to wear layers of skin to protect us from the cold. Although, winter can sometimes be pictured as a lackluster season we forget that it is the most beautiful season of the year. The snow glistens as icicles take form on rooftops, the sound of children laughing and throwing snowballs fill the atmosphere during the winter months. Winter is a sign of hibernation, as animals hide away to prepare for the spring. In the wintery months we are challenged to slow down not rushing to our destination. We are forced to hide away in the confinements of shelter and invent indoor activities when the schools shut down for our children. The children tend to have no complaints because they have a free day off from school while companies close down giving employees a day off from work. I have learned that winter can be the best season to learn how to slow down, rekindle some passions, and make time for family. Winter has a way of helping me realize that there is no need to rush but to embrace the simple moments. In American culture we are prone to the fast pace of life living in a microwavable generation unlike other cultures we do not know how to rest. We rush through each moment without taking time to slow down and smell the roses in life. Winter teaches us the lessons of enjoying the little things, reflecting on the bigger picture and slowly navigating through life. While winter still resides for the next couple of months I challenge you to take some time out of your busy schedule and embrace the magical joys of winter. Reflect, Refuel and Relax during the winter months…..

 

 

Carpe Diem: Seize The Moment, Seize The Day!

Sometimes we never take time to seize the moments that are precious in life, instead we find ourselves rushing through life from one moment to the next moment. Every moment becomes a speck in our mind leaving empty voids of us rushing through life. 


We begin to rush our life where living in a microwave generation is the norm. No one has patience to take the time to breathe and look into the sky to see the clouds depart as if heaven was reaching out to them. Every sunset and sunrise becomes a blur that seeps into the back of our minds. 

Every day should be cherished and seized with living in the moment. I realize life can be consuming if we allow it to consume us, however we have to be willing to step away from the outside world long enough to silence ourselves.  I believe silence is the most profound thing we can cherish to recollect our thoughts. 

When you begin to seize the day you allow yourself to get caught up in the journey not the destination. Life is made up of many journeys with many lessons, nevertheless we have to be able to step away from the chaos long enough to embrace seizing the day.

According to Webster’s Dictionary carpe diem is best define as the enjoyment of the pleasures without concern for the future. So often, we become stressed with life that we never indulge in the simplicity life offers. 
Enjoying the simple things such as birds chirping in the early am, watching the stars at night or looking at the brightness of the sun have lessons and pleasures attached to them. If we become prone to seizing the moments we will be happier and less stress.
Stress is gained when we are filled with the worries of the past. Carpe diem is much more than a common expression but it is the way to live life. I challenge you to take time to slow your pace, embrace nature and meditate in the stillness. Life is sweeter when we throw off the blues to allow joy to radiate our souls. 
Life is waiting for you patiently to seize the day with pleasure!